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論壇地址：http://www.laaxth.live/bbs/thread-489095-1-1.html

（回答一）Michael Dougan, Cafe Owner at Michael's Cafe American (2017-present)
I’d like to offer a contrary view, one that explores outsider and insider perceptions of politeness. This from the perspective of an American expat living full-time in Japan for only a few years (It still has that new Japan smell!)
How we measure politeness, and rudeness, across cultures, depends on what reference point we’re comparing it to, and even in what generation, what time frx.
By contemporary U.S. standards, Japan seems exceedingly polite. But is it?
That’s by current American standards, not traditional American standards. The U.S., too, not long ago had much more formal manners and social expectations than it does now. The system-wide informality, and “whatever” casualness of average American behavior is a relatively recent thing.

作為在日本全職生活了幾年的美國人，我想提供一個與大眾相反的觀點，分別從局外人和局內人兩個角度看待這一問題。
我們如何衡量禮貌和粗魯，取決于我們用哪個參照點進行比較，甚至取決于以哪個時代、哪個時間段進行比較。
以當代美國的標準來看，日本人似乎非常有禮貌。但事實真的是這樣嗎?

如果將時間前推幾十年，那時的美國人還較為傳統，人們的禮儀標準和社會責任感也比現在高得多。
現在人們眼里不拘禮節，直率灑脫的美國人形象，其實是最近幾十年間才逐漸建立起來的。



[Only a few generations ago, American men wore suits and hats even to baseball games]
The U.S. once preserved traditional manners and formal courtesies, though it always had a healthy degree of anti-authoritarian rebellion around the edges. Being a frontier, it was never quite as formal and aristocratic as Europe. It was rough, but some formalities prevailed.
Up through the middle of the 20th century everybody said “Mr.”, Miss, and Mrs.”, “Sir”, and “Ma’m” was considered polite. One never immediately used someone’s first name, not until you were given permission to.
This sounds not unlike Japan, doesn’t it? That’s because it wasn’t that far apart. Things were more formal in America, not that long ago. This persisted relatively undisturbed until the 1960s, forward.
The new reality is especially noticeable in the way Americans dress then, and now. 21st century adult men dress like 10-year-old boys used to dress. Baggy shorts, baseball caps.
We accept “casual” as the norm, for all but the most traditional of professions, accountants, lawyers, or jobs that require an official uniform. Most of the rest of us have enjoyed very relaxed standards, very informal dress codes, and behavioral codes.

就在幾代人以前，美國人甚至連觀看棒球賽都要穿戴正式的西裝和帽子
盡管美國遠離歐洲大陸，盡管在禮儀方面從來沒有像歐洲那樣正式化和貴族化。但美國仍然保留著傳統的禮儀和正式的禮節，雖然在形式上比歐洲粗糙，但該有的繁文縟節還是一樣不少。

直到20世紀中期（1950年），每個美國人見面時都會相互稱“先生”和“夫人”，這樣的稱呼被認為是有禮貌的。沒有人會一見面就直呼其名，除非你得到對方的允許。這種情況一直持續到20世紀60年代
這些聽起來是不是很像現在的日本?

如果讓五十年前的美國人仔細審視21世紀的美國人。那么在他們的眼里，所有的美國成年人都如同10歲的小男孩一樣，身穿寬松的短褲，頭戴棒球帽。
如今的美國，除了最傳統的職業，如會計師、律師需要穿著正式制服工作。大部分美國人都喜歡身穿“便裝”辦公。
在日常生活中，我們大多數人都享受著非常寬松的生活標準、非常隨意的著裝規范和行為規范。



That said — contrary to popular belief — there are plenty of rude people in Japan. Rude speech or insensitive behavior in Japan, while immediately evident to fellow Japanese, might be completely lost on non-Japanese. To an average American, invisible, below the radar. We don’t have receptors tuned to pick it up, even when we witness rudeness first-hand.
If one Japanese person insulted another Japanese person, in a social situation, I probably wouldn’t even know unless someone explained it to me later.
The Japanese language, to our ear, has fewer examples of what Americans recognize as vulgar, obscene, or profane. But within the Japanese language, words chosen to covey hostility or disrespect are immediately recognized as risky, taboo, equally potent.

事實上，與世人普遍的看法相反-日本其實有很多行為粗魯的人。
注意，在日本人眼里，行為粗魯指的是不禮貌的言語或魯莽粗俗的行為。

雖然日本人一眼就能看出彼此的行為是否禮貌得體，但對于非日本人來說，很難看出其中隱藏的微妙玄機。即使我們親眼目睹了某個日本人做出了某種粗魯行為，我們也很難辨識。

比如一個日本人在社交場合侮辱了另一個日本人，如果沒有其他日本人在旁邊向我解釋，我可能永遠都不會察覺
在我們美國人看來，日語中類似粗俗、淫穢或褻瀆之類的詞語較少。但充滿敵意或不尊重的詞語不少，這些詞語對于日本人的殺傷力同樣有力無比。